Cobenfy

So, Today at 1:30pm I have a have an appointment with my Medication manager. My Med manager has been a part of my care team for over 4 years now and overall she's a Nurse Practitioner. Recently, I was watching T.V. with Katie and saw an advertisement for Cobenfy which is a medication that was FDA approved for Schizophrenia in 2023. Currently, I'm on Resperidone which is a dopamine blocker which has led to all sorts of problems in my life. Between 50 lbs of weight gain that i cant get off no matter how hard I try, to not feeling emotions having no reaction when things go good.... it's a bit shitty of a medication. But it was the best they had in the 60s and 70s and we always went based on the adage that if it isn't broke don't fix it. Today however, when i speak to my NP, I'm going to ask her about switching medications. If it assists in me losing weight, having less TD symptoms, and overall gives me a better outlook for the next 20 years then it's what i should do, right? I'm not saying any one medication is a cure all. And there is certainly no way of confirming that this medication will fit with my biochemistry.... But damn man... if i have to suffer hallucinations the rest of my life living on Resperidone then that's really not a life i wanna live, ya know. I'd love to just hear my cats Meow one day... rather than listening to them speak broken English complaining about treats all the time. That... and I'd love for the 3am ghosts to just sorta Disappear from the house. While i do have noisy neighbors, it wouldn't make sense for the how to start to Creek and Crack the moment my wife falls asleep at night. Or... worse yet... my Uber Passengers to have knowledge of my life that they discuss on the phone with their friends while they are my passenger. Either the whole state is against me.... Or I'm not healthy. And that ultimately is the goal. I had a therapist in 2019 tell me that the goal was "silence" to paraphrase... that i didn't have to suffer these hallucinations and that if they are continuing or ongoing then it makes sense to adjust the medication. Not to the point of numbness or becoming a Zombie.... but to the point where the only voice i hear in my head is my own.... and to the point where external hallucinations are "Non-Existent."

In other news, Tomorrow i have a scheduled interview with a company in Worcester, MA regarding a MSP Position. The position didn't post a salary, but curious enough in the Job Description it did give the possibility of working from home. Worcester is about an hour away from my house so if i could skip the drive every morning it would be great. I don't know if they are hiring for 1st, 2nd, or 3rd, shift.... And i also don't know if they will require On-Call or Weekend work.... but again, if i could work from home i really wouldn't care. The cost savings from getting rid of my car and adjusting the insurance would save us $800-$1000 a month... So it's basically like saving a weeks pay (Providing i get paid $1,000 a week). If they did require me to drive up to Worcester every day... i would. I have no problems with it and as an Uber Driver I've been driving from Providence to Boston a lot anyways. If i ended up Commuting then i'd probably continue to Uber Drive on my days off so I can pay for my car every month. Even if 8 Days only amounted to an extra $100 a day.... It's still an extra $800 a month which would be enough for me to pay my car and the insurance. 

2026 is quickly approaching and I'm working on putting together a list of shit i want to accomplish. It's my 40th year after all (Ends in November).... and This year should be meaningful right? If the whole year goes by without any new experiences then it's a waste of a year. For now though, It's off to work until my appointment. I'll write more soon about my 2026 goals and maybe... just maybe... we can get them accomplished.