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Ramblings of a Schizo

While I've written plenty over my 30 years behind a keyboard, I'm most proud of my book. The Ramblings of a Schizo written by T.A. Michaels which i had self published through Amazon Earlier this year.  The book follows my early adulthood and the mental distress caused by bad doctors and symptom relapse of Schizo-affective disorder. While nothing can take back what has happened to me, After being through the ringer this year mentally... i can say that things would be much worse if i stopped taking my medication. Am I on the right medication? I can't say for certain. I know that being in public is a non-stop assault from strangers calling me things from pervert to crazy person and the only thing i can think of in that regard is the fact that my Risperdal caused me to gain 60 pounds since going back on the medication in 2017.... And ever since Marjory Taylor Greene Infamously called every fat guy a creep, I've felt like I've been judged more for my weight than i have for my mind. Which in all reality is sad considering I'm only 40.... what does the general population expect me to do? Just shut up and take it for the next 40 years till I'm dead? These things would force most people to hide in their house forever.... until they one day wake up at 70 regretting never taking charge sooner. This is why during my next Medication Assessment (end of December), i am going to ask about going on Covenfy which i have heard is an alternative treatment for Schizophrenia which produces no additional weight gain. Had i known about the medication years ago i would have looked into it, but it wasn't until watching T.V. with my wife that i found out the medication even exists. I'm not hoping its a cure all... but damn, i would love to walk in a room somewhere out in public a year from now without men and women judging the fact that 10 years of prolonged exposure to Risperdal (which increases your pro-estrogen level) caused me to grow what looks like female tits. Talk about putting a complex on an already difficult situation. Not only do people assume that I'm Transsexual (Which I'm not), Getting constant shit from Men who are either turned on by them unnaturally or just men that want to bust on a guy for having tits. Or angry old christian women thinking I'm Lucifer which is even more of a complex. Despite having dealt with this for the better part of my adult life... i haven't killed myself. I guess the 1950's solution to schizophrenia was to turn aggressive men into females. This is why I'm going to be exploring alternative solutions for my Schizophrenia. At least my wife understands. And if i can get on medication that is going to treat the symptoms and and cause me to lose weight, then it's whats best for me at this point in my life. 

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